You've Got Time
by Mathilde Marie
Summary: Maya Luna has begun to lose herself when she is stricken with personal loss and a brand new prison sentence. Will she slip further away? Or will she find herself in the least likely of places? OC/other inmates - relationships to be decided.
1. Everything Is Different

_"Come on, Honey Bea, stay with me. No, not like this. Not like this..." Maya's voice tapered off as she pleaded, shaking the lifeless body that once held the soul of her best friend. "Please!" she shrieked. "Please." Her voice was now a whisper as she pulled the girl close and smoothed her hair. _

_She didn't hear the knocking at the door, didn't notice the same door being broken in, and was certainly clueless to the looks of shock on the EMTs' faces. One came to check Beatrix's vitals, a courtesy more than anything at this point, while the other slowly began to circle the apartment. After about a minute, the second EMT picked up her cell and made a call. Maya was completely oblivious to being reported. _

_The man and woman, as they took Bea's body, stiffly told Maya there was no reason for her to come. The girl was dead. _Dead_. The word pounded in her brain. They didn't even bother to close the door behind them, and Maya made no effort to do so from her fixed spot on the hardwood floor. Around her, everywhere, was drug paraphernalia. She had been at her parents' house in New Jersey the whole weekend for her little brother's graduation, and while she was away her friends used her place as a party pad. Nothing out of the ordinary, only this time it turned fatal._

_A squad of no fewer than five officers were suddenly in the apartment, two of them roughly pulling her up to her feet and the rest searching the apartment like it was their life's mission. _

_It didn't take long for them to know they could have her put away for quite some time._

...

No one was with her as she sat in the- _what is this, a waiting room?_- waiting room, of Litchfield Penitentiary waiting for her name to be called. She was dressed in the clothes she had been wearing prior to her short stay at the small Brooklyn jail she had been held in before the trial. The trial was a blur in her mind. In her grief, Maya was numb. She hadn't listened to much of her attorney's guidance, all of her 'friends' were too scared to come around, and she wasn't strong enough to face her family. The disappointment she knew they had to be feeling was enough to kill her.

...

_Everything had just gotten so out of hand. First, it was Maya and Bea getting high at the park after school in eighth grade. Then it was selling dime bags in high school. After graduation they moved to New York for school. College introduced them to the right people and better weed, and their client list blew up. That's right around the time where Maya's personal love affair with weed (and Johnny) had started up. She smoked constantly. She had silently suffered from anxiety, and at first getting high was a great way to deal with that, but it had now morphed into simply being one of her favorite pasttimes. She fucking loved how it made her feel, just chill and happy. _

_When demand began to heavily outweigh supply, she took to growing herself, and she was good. Really good. They were in deep before they knew it, and now Johnny was their partner. But Johnny was interested in more than weed. First he introduced them to molly. Then pills. Then it was coke. Johnny was almost always on something, but for the most part Bea and Maya only went stronger than weed on special occasions. On one special occasion, Maya met Margot. As the connection between the two grew, Maya saw less of Beatrix and Johnny. She had a sense that Bea was becoming a little too keen on the cocaine, but she wasn't the girl's mom, and she trusted her best friend's judgment. A glaring mistake, she now knew._

...

"Maya Luna," a gruff woman with not a spot of make up and an ill-fitting guard's uniform barked. Maya tried to stand, forgetting she was cuffed to her chair, which was bolted to the floor. "Come on, Luna, I don't have all day," the woman raised her voice in irritation. Maya jingled the cuffs. The lady came over and roughly removed them, replacing the cold metal with a beefy hand around Maya's narrow wrist. The two made their way through the doors. The realness of it all had yet to sink in for Maya. This was all a nightmare, and the worst part was over, so now she would just remain numb until she awoke.

"Strip," the lady barked again. Maya said nothing, just removed her crumpled clothes and stood still. "Squat and cough." She did as she was instructed and was tossed her new clothing. The garments were bright orange. In no particular rush she clothed herself, took the blanket and pillow that were being held out to her, and followed the guard outside to a large white van.

...

It was frigid in the corridor as Maya was guided to her temporary cell. She was oblivious. She was numb, face blankly staring forward, not catching a single word that was spoken to her. The short ride in the van had been for the most part silent. The driver was pretty chatty at first, until she realized she was talking to the air. Maya had happened to catch her informing the van full of fresh inmates that they would go by their last names 'on the inside'.

"Alright, and as you can see, the temporary holding is all filled up," a brief pause, Maya just realizing she is the only orange-clad lady left, "so we went ahead and assigned you, Luna. Follow me." She silently followed. She was led to a grouping of cell blocks, only there were no doors on the rooms. They reminded her briefly of cubicles. "Here you are, Luna," she said, motioning to the room ahead of them. Maya walked to the vacant bed on the right. "Good luck, Nicky. The silence from this one is spooky."

Maya set her new belongings on the bed, only now noticing a sheet to be tucked into her stack. She stretched it over the bed and placed the pillow at the head. As a chill went down her spine, she draped the blanket across her shoulders and sat on the bed, curling into the warmth. She looked up to see the biggest head of hair she'd ever seen on a white girl, and two wild eyes staring back at her.

"Huh," the inmate said simply. Maya just looked back at her, but Nicky didn't say another word. She went back to reading the black and white paper in her hands. Maya vaguely made out the word 'Bugle', but she didn't care to inspect further.

...

For the most part, Maya spent the day alone in bed. Nicky left a little while after lunch (Maya attended, but sat alone and didn't eat a thing) and before Maya knew it, it was dinner time. The thought of food in general made her gag, but the tray in front of her was downright nauseating. After dinner, the inmates all gathered to watch a movie, but Maya opted to go back to her bed. She was stopped on her way, but the young male CO quickly realized her depressed state and let her go.

"You had the right idea, kid. They showed 'The Notebook', it was a fuckin' shit show in there. Talk about your water works. Tears everywhere." Nicky's loud, distinctive voice pulled Maya back into reality. She shifted so that she was resting up on one arm as her eyes found her cell mate. "You doin' alright, kid?" Maya nodded. "Eh, a reaction! Baby steps," she winked. Maya felt a smile coming but it died before it reached her lips. Instead she nodded.

The two spent the rest of the night in a much expected silence.


	2. Yesterday Is Here

Maya didn't sleep the first two nights. She wasn't crying into her pillow, or talking to herself, she wasn't doing or feeling anything, really. She just lay in bed, eyes open wide, body and mind numb. The morning after the second sleepless night, Nicky intervened.

"Geez, kid, you look like a fuckin' zombie. Can't get any shut-eye?" she frowned as she walked over to Maya, gently running her thumbs across the dark circles under Maya's eyes. The contact made Maya's skin buzz. "I've been keeping an eye on you, unlike our beloved COs. You haven't eaten a thing since you got here. C'mon, I'm gonna see to it that you don't shrivel up your first week. Already not much to you." As she spoke, she urged the sitting Maya to stand. The girl was shaking ever so slightly and with an encouraging smile, Nicky urged her to follow.

"Now the first meal is always the worst. No gettin' around it. So you've just gotta choke it down, chase it with some water, and keep it in there," she tapped Maya's stomach. "Think you can do that for me?" She gave a crooked smile. Maya nodded.

"Yeah," she murmured, and Nicky's eyes widened.

"A real-life, honest to goodness, verbal response! I'm speechless!" The corners of Maya's lips twitching up formed the first smile she'd allowed herself at Litchfield.

In the dining room, Maya was hit with the unpleasant wave of nausea that was always lurking under her surface. Nicky placed her ahead of herself in line and as she was handed a tray, Nicky had to encourage her to take it. Behind the glass, a hispanic girl rolled her heavily lined eyes but it was lost on Maya. The girl walked to her usual empty table, but she stopped when she felt Nicky reach out and hold her arm.

"How about you sit with me today?" she wiggled her eyebrows and Maya smiled a little more than before.

"That would be nice, thanks." Nicky grinned and led her to the table. Maya was surprised to recognize the woman who'd driven the van, head in her hand as she hunched over her plate. She stabbed at her food with a plastic fork. There were a few other women seated at the table, but instead of paying attention to them Maya chose to focus on her food. She didn't pay any mind as Nicky explained.

"Luna. That is her last name! Yeah, I know she isn't. It is very weird. Oh, look, she's got her first bite going down! Just keep it there, sweetie, don't let it come back up at you. There you go," she rubbed Maya's back as the girl swallowed and lifted another bite. "See, it's not so bad!"

The rest of the meal went on similarly, Nicky alternating between explaining Maya and encouraging her. It was clear to see that this girl was the life of the place, or at least a very lively component. After breakfast, the inmates were to report to their jobs. Maya had yet to be assigned so she went back to her cell. She returned to her spot, curled up in bed, eyes wide open. She alternated staring at Nicky's side of the room, the ceiling, and the painted cinderblock wall, depending on how she was laying. Lunch time came and went, Maya stayed right where she was.

...

"Luna, babe, let's talk," Nicky said with a grin as she came bustling back into the room. Instead of going to her own bed, she made her way to Maya's and sat criss-cross at the foot. Maya, already curled into the top half of the bed, saw no point in arguing so she instead sat straight up. She waited for Nicky to go on.

"Alright, I've gotta know. What are you in here for? And I know someone's probably already told you you're not supposed to answer that. But that's bullshit. And I know me telling you that's bullshit probably seems like bullshit, but it's not. Just wanna get to know you better, and that's a pretty basic thing." Maya hesitated before speaking, a pause which Nicky utilized, "I mean, if you really don't wanna tell me I understand. I-"

"Possession, cultivation, intent to distribute, and a pending charge of involuntary criminal negligent manslaughter. Might have the wording wrong on that one." Her voice, Nicky noted, had a little tinge of a rasp to it. Not nearly of Nicky's degree, but it was there.

"Hold up, manslaughter?" Nicky looked her small frame over, "I guess you said involuntary. But shit." Maya just nodded. Nicky's eyes narrowed in thought. "Drugs, drugs... I'm gonna say weed. Was it weed?"

"Yeah, it was," she nodded again.

"You seem like you could be a bit of a hippy. Cultivating, eh? Got yourself a green thumb?" The smile that came to Maya's lips was the most sincere she'd had in a while.

"You could say that. I seemed to have a knack for it."

"Very cool. My friend Red's got a little greenhouse club going. Its members are mostly of the geriatric variety, but I'm sure they'd love to have you!"

"Maybe," Maya offered, not so sure she was ready to expand her social circle past this one person yet. A few moments of silence passed.

"Forgive me for being blunt, but do you like dudes or chicks?" Maya's brows lifted more out of amusement than anything else. "Hey, in my defense, a very relevant question for this, eh, situation. Incarceration can be a lonely business."

"Both, actually," she said, almost attempting a small laugh.

"Ah, so you like sex then, eh? I like it," she lowered her voice and grinned at the younger girl. Maya smiled and gave a shrug.

"No denying that, I guess."

"Well we don't get conjugal visits or any of that, but if you like pussy, there's a pretty big menu here. If you think to, consult me first. I've been around a few times, I can be your guide." She winked and Maya allowed herself a breathy laugh that time. The two made small talk for a while longer and suddenly it was dinner time. Nicky dragged Luna along and it played out much like breakfast had.

...

She had actually managed to sleep for a few hours that night, so she was feeling just a bit better the next morning. She decided she would shower today, and she followed Nicky to their section's assigned bathroom. Something felt just a bit off to Maya, but she couldn't place her finger on it. She kept the shower hot and short and was surprised at how good it felt. From that point until dinner, her fourth day at Litchfield was pretty much a repeat of the third.

The only difference at dinner was that instead of sharing more Luna trivia, Nicky and a tall straight-haired blonde were talking seriously of the impending return of someone named Alex. Maya sensed an uncharacteristic discomfort in Nicky, but didn't want to read too deeply into it. The group was headed to the recreation room for a game of cards, but Nicky dismissed herself to bed. Maya was already headed in that direction, so the two walked back to their cell block in without a word. Nicky's silence was deafening to Maya, and it was getting under her skin. She approached what she deemed as the root of the situation in what she knew to be true Nicky fashion: directly.

"Who's Alex?" Nicky's head full of hair bounced as she snapped her head over to Maya. She looked taken aback.

"A girl. Just a girl." She sighed and ran a hand through her mane. "She used to be an inmate. And Chapman says she's coming back. Violated her parole." More silence. Maya took another cue from the older girl and walked over to the opposite bed. She seated herself at the foot.

"But who is she?" She searched for Nicky's eyes. The sad orbs found her.

"Just another person's girl who I got myself hung up on, like I always seem to fuckin' do." Maya gave a sad sort of smile. Nicky scoffed. "Fuck! Look at me! I'm moping! I need to snap out of it, I always snap out of it."

"Well how do you usually do that? Maybe I can help?" Nicky gave Maya an unreadable look.

"I don't think you'd want to jump right into my normal means for coping in this place."

"Try me?" Maya challenged, without a clue as to what she was getting herself into. Nicky's face took on a look of determination.

"If you say so." She stood and motioned for the girl to follow. The two walked through the empty halls, going through multiple sets of doors and cells until they reached the final set of closed double doors. Nicky held one open for Maya, then slipped through and closed it silently. She grabbed Maya's hand and marched down the aisle, passed the empty rows, and headed straight for the stage. She jumped up and helped Maya do the same. She walked around to the podium and Maya silently followed. Then, much to her shock, Nicky's fingers found the waistband of Maya's pants and began to tug.

"Whoa, Nicky, I-" a finger came up to silence her.

"Look, I don't really care if I don't give you a lady boner. You wanted to help me deal, and this is how I deal. Trust me, I'll be doing you just as much of a favor." Maya's breath hitched. She had always been an impulsive person, and under different circumstances she would have agreed in a flash. Slowly she nodded, and Nicky pulled her pants down, underwear included, in one swift motion. She dropped to her knees, and Maya leaned back into the podium as Nicky's mouth found her.

...

Nicky told Maya to leave a few minutes after her, because it was getting late and there was a better chance of them getting stopped by a CO if they were together. Maya's head was dizzy in a blur of emotions. The release Nicky had given her was the first real feeling she'd let herself feel in the last month since this whole mess started. After what seemed like an appropriate amount of time, she left the chapel and made her way back through the hall. Her breathing became heavy, her lungs tight.

She caught sight of a bathroom and ran inside. It wasn't her normal bathroom, but her eyes began to blur and she couldn't tell a difference. She ran into a doorless stall and sat on the toilet, her elbows resting on her knees and her head in her hands. She gasped for breath and a lump formed in her throat. Her gasps turned to sobs. All of the tears she hadn't shed in the last month came flooding from her eyes as she sat in the stall. The footsteps of a stranger approaching were masked by Maya's grief.

"Hey, you okay?" If Maya had looked up she would have seen a tall, full-figured girl with dark, dark skin and big curls. She only cried harder. "Hey, now, it's okay." The girl hesitated before reaching down and gently smoothing Maya's hair. The movement was repeated as her breathing steadied, and she finally looked up at the girl. When the girl's hand found the bottom of her hair once more, Maya grasped it in her own and gave a weak squeeze. She looked up into big, deep brown eyes..

"Thanks," she breathed. The girl squeezed her hand back and smiled sadly.

* * *

**I'm glad to see people are reading this! I've never put an OC into a fic before, so this is new territory for me. I'd love your feedback! Thanks for reading (:**


	3. The Day Is New

Maya walked very slowly on her way back to her cell, so there'd been no evidence of her tears. Nicky never knew the better, and for that Maya was grateful. Her breakdown hadn't had much of anything to do with Nicky, it was just a reaction to the well of emotions she'd been pressing down. She did feel lighter now that she'd let some of it out.

Every day in the showers, Maya continued to feel as if something were off. She got the same weird feeling when they were made to stand outside of their cells for count. At first she couldn't put her finger on it. Then it grew into a feeling of being out-of-place. Finally, exactly a week after she'd been at Litchfield, it dawned on her. She was standing behind Nicky in line for the showers, and after tossing the idea back and forth in her head, she decided to approach it.

"Nicky," she whispered, leaning in to the girl's puff of hair. "I'm getting the feeling that the girls we bunk and shower with are all..." She hesitated, instantly feeling foolish.

"White?" Nicky provided with a toothy grin.

"Well, yeah." Maya tried to conceal a smile, but finally let it show with the giggle that escaped her throat.

"Yeah, it seems weird at first, but they kinda segregate us in here. I've been wondering what they were thinking with you..." She looked the girl up and down. Maya was mixed, half-black half-white. She had very light skin and baby fine hair, but anyone who really looked at her could clearly see she had a natural brown to her skin. She often got mistaken for Hispanic, her last name being Luna, but never white. Their conversation paused when it was Nicky's turn to shower.

...

The girls took their trays of breakfast to their table. Morello and Chapman were discussing something about articles and pieces. With all of the magazines Morello was always fawning over, Maya figured they were talking about clothes.

"So, do you think I should tell anyone?" Maya asked, turning to Nicky.

"Tell anyone what?" Officer Luschek asked, suddenly right behind them. Nicky raised a brow and looked from Luna to Luschek.

"Appears Litchfield's finest may have overlooked some of Luna's paperwork."

"Impossible," he said with a condescending tone that rubbed Maya the wrong way.

"Does she look fuckin' caucasian to you?" Nicky playfully elbowed the officer's hip.

"Watch it, Nichols," he barked. She just laughed as his concentration on Maya started to bring confusion to his face. "I'll go see what happened. What are you?" He looked from Maya's face down to her ID badge. "Luna? What is that, Mexican?"

"By your standards, I'd presume black." He gave her another perplexed look. She stared back blankly. Rather than speaking further, he turned and disappeared out of sight.

"That settles that," Nicky said with a shrug. The two went back to chatting mindlessly throughout the meal. Maya had recently started indulging in small-talk with the other girls at their table. The group got up to go, Maya back to her bunk and the rest off to work. As they exited Luschek was waiting.

"Been reassigned, Luna. You've also got a work assignment, starting today." A voice came from the radio on his shoulder. "Work calls, go have Healy explain it. Nichols, get your ass to electric." As he quickly walked away Maya turned to Nicky, panic surfacing quickly.

"Hey, you'll be fine," Nicky placed a hand on the girl's shoulder. "O'Neill's back that way, he can show you to Healy's." Maya's heart was jumping wildly in her chest. She was just getting used to her new little world, it couldn't be shaken up so quickly. "I'll see ya around, alright?" Maya nodded before stepping forward and hugging her. Nicky laughed.

"Sorry, I'm affectionate," Maya whispered with a smile. "See you." They parted and Maya found Officer O'Neill. He led her to Sam Healy's office, where she was asked to take a seat.

"Hello, Luna," Healy said as he laced his fingers together and leaned in towards her. "Seems we've got you into a little mix up, and I'm sorry about that." She just nodded, apprehensive of him and desiring to speak as little as possible. "Normally we might just leave you, but we just got a new inmate to place in your block and an opening for you in another block, so it's really a seamless switch." She just gave him a ludicrous look and listened on as he told her the new assignments. He gave her directions to the library and sent her on her way.

...

"You know, I've been meaning to sign up for Pilates. The studio is right across the street from my Starbucks!"

"I tire too easily from physical activity, so I just switched to a gluten-free diet. It's working _wonders_, MacKenzie."

"I can tell, hon. Your body is looking _so_ bikini ready."

_The fuck? _ Maya's face scrunched in confusion as she walked slowly through the rows and aisles of books. No one had been at the desk by the entrance, so she followed the voices further.

"Speaking of coffee, how adorable is the new shop uptown?"

"Cute, but have you _seen_ the cupcake boutique on fifteenth? Oh, Amanda, it's simply to die for."

_Cupcake boutique? _Maya came around the corner and was shocked to see the girl from the bathroom. She was talking to a smaller girl with a grey sweatshirt and shortly shaved hair. The two were lost in a fit of giggles when she hesitantly approached.

"I'm sorry, do you two work in here?" she started. They turned to face her, their smiles ghosts of the previous laughter. "I, uh, just got assigned."

"About damn time! Man, business been booming lately." Maya glanced around the empty library and nodded. "Well, most people are working right now, but after a while, when shifts change, you'll see. Feeling better today?" Maya's eyes went wide and her cheeks flushed with pink. She glanced at the shorter girl, hoping the tale of her tears hadn't been passed along.

"Yeah, thanks," she nodded, forcing a smile. The girl nodded.

"I'm Taystee, this is Poussey. We run the library, so you get to answer to us." Her grin was full of pride. It was infectious, and Maya's smile grew true.

"I'm Maya. Or Luna, I guess? It's nice to meet you guys." The two smiled at her.

"You, too, Maya," Poussey spoke up. Her smile made Maya's chest feel warm. It was so sincere, it drew her in. She quickly looked away as she realized she may have stared too long. Taystee led her to a cart full of books a few rows over in nonfiction and explained the system. Maya was very comfortable in a library, she'd had work-study at the library in college. Taystee returned to her spot by the window with Poussey and they were back to laughing in no time.

Maya thought of Margot. They'd worked in the library together all four years of school but only began speaking to each other their senior year. Their affair had blossomed quickly and heavily. Ever since college and Johnny, Maya felt like she wasn't in her own skin. She was going downhill fast and was eager for the distraction Margot provided. It had still been going on when Maya was arrested. Maya had also still been seeing Johnny at her arrest. Thinking of the two of them now, Maya was surprised to realize she didn't really miss them. Her rendezvous with Nicky had really made her miss the sex, for sure. The exposure to that feeling made her crave it. Nicky had been spot on while discussing Maya's sexuality.

_Ah, so you like sex then, eh?_

Like was a definite understatement. Maya loved everything about it. She loved being so close to another person, she loved the way the pleasure made her whole body tingle, she loved how empowered it made her feel. She lost herself in her thoughts and didn't catch herself watching Poussey through a gap in the books. She didn't pay any mind to the fact that the girl was now alone. She was doing the same as Maya, pulling books from a cart and returning them to their spots on the shelves. She bit her lip as she concentrated on the titles of books in front of her and Maya found herself doing the same.

"Oh come on, boo. Don't be so down!" She jumped as she turned to face Taystee.

_Down? Shit, you're supposed to be sad. You _are_ fucking sad. Fuck._

"Working on it. One day at a time, you know," she said, placing the book in her hand into the space on the shelf.

"Yeah, I know that," Taystee nodded, giving her a knowing look. "I thought I'd come keep you company. Unless you really wanna be alone, but I'm not gonna take that shit anyway." She grinned and Maya couldn't help but laugh.

"That would be great, thanks. But if you have other things you need to do you don't need to worry about me." She retained her smile, hoping she wasn't being an inconvenience. Wallowing didn't seem to be widely accepted in prison. But to her surprise, Taystee just rolled her eyes.

"Even if they did notice me not working on my own I'd just say I was teaching you the system. Most people in here wouldn't know where to start. Be putting the books away upside down and shit. Fools," she shook her head and Maya nodded in understanding. She had been shocked when they'd told her the library was usually pretty busy.

"I'll make sure to play dumb." The two shared a small laugh as they took books from the cart.

"So why haven't I seen you around? I mean, besides..." She shrugged as her voice trailed off and she grabbed another book.

"I don't think they read my paperwork very well. I've been bunking with Nicky Nichols in cell block-" Taystee's eyes grew wide as she laughed out loud.

"They put you in the suburbs?" she cut Maya off. "That's some funny shit. We've got idiots running this joint, man!" From what she'd seen, Maya couldn't disagree with that. She laughed softly as she walked up the aisle a bit then knelt to place the book she held on the bottom shelf. The girls spent the rest of the morning getting to know each other. Taystee's bubbly personality put a pang in Maya's chest. It reminded her of how full of life Bea had been, and she longed for her friend. But Maya and Taystee were connecting really well, and that brought her happiness and relief.

* * *

**Apologies for the delayed update! I had an unexpected move, then a delay in attaining internet. This was almost done before all of the craziness so I just wanted to post and start fresh with the next one. I was also being a lazy proof-reader, so sorry for any errors. Thank you for the feedback and follows, it's beyond awesome to know you're reading (:**


	4. Such Fragile Broken Things

Lunch that first day Maya was in the library began on an awkward note. Once the girls closed the library they walked to the cafeteria together. Maya and Taystee continued to talk, laughing often and enjoying each other's company. Maya noticed a sullen look on Poussey's face but didn't address it. Taystee was utterly oblivious. When they entered the cafeteria, the girls seated at the table they approached each gave Maya sour, hateful looks. The intensity gave her chills. Taystee dismissed herself and walked with Maya and Poussey to the line.

"Sorry about them," Taystee said with a sad voice. "They're a little sensitive to new people I bring around now."

"Yeah, with good fucking reason," Poussey snapped, causing Maya to flinch. The girl's eyes followed the tray of food behind the glass barricade, careful not to look at Maya. Taystee's expression grew more sorrowful. When Maya gave a quizzical look, she mouthed _Long story_.

"If it'll help I can sit with Nicky again," Maya offered in a soft voice. Taystee pursed her lips together in thought. "Really," Maya persisted. Taystee just shrugged and it was decided. She and Poussey returned to their table as a smiling Nicky greeted Maya.

"Not eating with your new friends?" Nicky asked when Maya took a seat across from her, next to Lorna. She smiled a little.

"Can't get rid of me that easily. Besides, Taystee said they're apprehensive of new people." One of the girls at the table groaned, and Nicky rolled her eyes.

"That's because of Vee. Psycho bitch... I'll let them tell you about her. Well, you're welcome to sit here anytime, kid," she grinned, which Maya returned at a smaller degree.

The rest of the day went by quickly. Taystee floated between where Poussey and Maya worked at different sides of the library, occasionally going off to do her own thing when business picked up. After dinner the girls all dispersed to their cells or to do whatever it was that they did (Maya had yet to take part in any activities or to put herself into social settings) and Maya set off to find her new bunk. Taystee told her the way to "the Ghetto" and Maya found it with ease after retrieving her things from her old bunk.

Healy had told her that her new cell mate was Washington because someone called Watson had just gone somewhere he called SHU for a repeated time. None of these words meant anything to the still new Maya.

She found her assignment, the last cell on the left, and situated her things on the obviously vacant side. She briefly considered joining Taystee in watching television, but after the icy reception from Taystee's friends decided it would be less of a headache to just stay where she was.

As she sat in silence, she couldn't help her thoughts from drifting to Bea. She was adjusting to her new life in prison well, considering her broken state at her arrival, but the memory and sorrow of losing her best friend still rested not far below her surface. The two had been best friends since the first day of first grade. They'd bonded over their love of braids and the color yellow, which each had worn. As they grew, they grew together. It was a common jest from their friends and families that they were basically interchangeable. They'd excelled in school but also kept full and enjoyable social lives. They each wrote for the school paper, sang in the choir, and founded a yoga group. However, with age grew the complicated side of life and neither had coped well.

Maya squeezed her eyes closed, willing the increasingly dark thoughts away.

...

She was unaware of the time that had passed when she heard animated voices in the distance. As they approached, Maya's eyes remained closed. Her breathing ragged, she willed the tears to remain at bay. An infectious laughter drew near before dying as the girl stopped in the doorway. With one last deep exhale, Maya opened her eyes slowly to find that Poussey stared back. Maya instinctively bit her lip.

"What are you doing in Janae's bed?" The suspicious look Poussey threw at Maya was crippling. Just that morning the girl had greeted her sincerely; how much could have changed in such a short span of time?

"Oh," Maya breathed as she pushed her up to sit cross-legged, "I'm sorry, Healy told me it was my new assignment." She felt mere inches tall under the scrutinizing gaze. Poussey finally pulled her eyes from her new roommate and retired to her side of the cell without another word.

Maya returned to a lying position, curling up in a ball with her face to the wall. She shivered all through the night, her heart heavy in her chest.

...

"So, Luna," Chapman said warmly one morning at breakfast the following Monday, "wait, do you prefer Luna or Maya?"

"Either is fine," Maya answered softly, realizing she hadn't ever caught Chapman's first name. The blonde considered this a moment.

"Well, I was just wondering why I never see you on visitation day. Usually when someone is new..." Her voice faded as Maya's eyes dropped to the plate of eggs before her. She pushed them around with her fork.

"I don't even know if my family knows I'm here," her voice sounded, barely above a whisper. She willed away the strong urge to cry. "And my friends... Well, I don't even know that I really have any."

"I'm sorry," Chapman said, and from where she sat beside Maya she lightly rubbed the girl's back. The affection helped and with a few practiced breaths Maya gave her a sad smile.

"No one's fault but my own."

"Lots of us don't get visitors," Morello offered with a sympathetic smile. Maya had never experienced sympathy so sincere as what she'd seen from Lorna.

"Isn't that the truth," murmured Nicky as she violently stabbed the contents of her tray.

Maya hadn't allowed herself to think of her parents or younger brother. She had spent the last few days of happiness with them before she found Bea and her life changed for the worse. She carried them with her all through the day, frequently finding a corner of the library to lose herself in her tears before Taystee sent her off to rest.

After the next day didn't bring any improvement to Maya's mood, Taystee decided she needed to pull the girl out of it. She persuaded her to finally eat at her table amidst the glaring eyes of Taystee's friends and at every free moment she convinced her to participate in television watching, game playing, and any other activity she could think of.

A few days passed and Maya grew less concerned with the other girls, which now included Janae Watson whose apparent anger made Maya all the more upset in her bunk assignment. The girls in turn interacted among themselves, the deadly looks remaining but in a noticeably smaller capacity. However, the venomous eye of Poussey began to shake her to her core.

* * *

**Very anxious to know if you guys are still enjoying this! It's been a little slow-moving, but I'm steering it into the right direction. Let me know what you think!**


	5. Be OK

Another day, another breakfast. If that's what you could call it. The "oatmeal" was slightly grey and mostly lumpy. Maya pushed it around and avoided Taystee's expectant eyes. She had been the second person to ask why Maya never had a phone call or a visitor.

"And don't shrug those scrawny little shoulders at me. I ask you a question and I deserve an answer. Tough love." Maya almost smiled and finally braved eye contact.

"I never told my family what happened, so I don't know if they know I'm here. My best friend Bea..." Maya took a deep breath and shook herself lightly, willing away the bad thoughts, "Bea died, and that's kind of why I'm here." The woman seated at the far end of the table with eyes wide as saucers directed the orbs at Maya in an instant. Maya ignored the mildly concerning stare. "And my other fr-... well I just don't think there's anyone else worth calling."

Taystee's voice caught in her throat before she got a word out, her mouth hung open, and she stared back at Maya. She moved her lips several times to speak, each time stopping herself. Finally, she spoke. "You didn't ever tell your family where you were? You gotta call your mama, girl." Maya bit her lip.

"They'll be... I just don't want to upset them."

"They're sure as shit gonna be a lot more upset if they think you off dead somewhere!" Taystee raised her voice. "You gotta let 'em know!" Maya nodded.

"How do I do that?"

...

Of course another visit to Mr. Healy's was in order. Maya kept it short and didn't reply to any of his attempts to reach out to her. She knew he meant well, but he and his little figurines still gave her the chills. He gave her a form to fill out adding whoever she'd like to her call list. She listed her parent's home and cell numbers, as well as her younger brother Marshall's cell. That was all she wanted, all she needed.

Healy took sympathy on her and told her to go straight to the phones with a note from him. She should call immediately. While she was there he also had her fill out a visitor list and told her she could begin having visitors the following Friday. It took almost a week to process that paperwork, he was sorry he couldn't help more. With a tight, polite smile, she slid out of the office.

The walk to the phones felt ominous. Her heart beat so hard against her chest that she could almost hear it. She got in line, about five fellow inmates waiting before her. Three times she got out of line and walked a few feet away. Each time she reluctantly returned. The fourth time she stepped away she felt long, gentle fingers close around her wrist.

"What are you making a run for?" Chapman's voice was soft, curious. Maya was caught off guard.

"I am supposed to call my family. I just... I can't." The blonde pursed her lips for a moment, then pulled Maya behind her.

"I want to show you something. Follow me." She let the frail wrist go and the two walked down the hall. Everything here looked the same and Maya briefly prayed they weren't headed for the chapel. The double doors that were pushed open revealed the prison yard. Women walked or jogged around a track, some sat in the grass, reading or napping. It felt wonderful outside and Maya only began to realize how much she missed the sunlight and fresh air. Tears stung her eyes.

"This was the first thing that made me feel like a real person when I got here," Chapman explained, unable to hide her smile as she read the shorter girl's expression.

"Thank you, Chapman," Maya breathed, then shook her head. "You know, I don't know your name."

"It's Piper." The two smiled at one another. "Want to take a walk around the track?"

The simple joy of being outdoors rejuvenated Maya. She really knew what Piper was talking about, she felt positively alive. With her new-found energy, she mustered up her courage and returned to the phones. This time she remained in line.

Shaking fingers punched in the phone number she had known her whole life. It seemed to ring for ages, and she had to fight her wild desire to hang up and run. On what must have been the tenth ring, someone picked up.

"Hello?" a hesitant young man asked after accepting the toll charges.

"Marsh!" Maya yelped and tears instantly fell. "Oh, my god, Marsh. I'm so glad it's you."

"Maya!" The volume of his voice filled her ear. "Maya, what the fuck!"

"Marshall, I'm sorry, I-"

"No, no don't be. I'm sorry, I just- What happened?" Maya's voice shook as she recalled the shortest version of the story she could. About her involvement with Johnny and "the business", about Bea's passing which her brother had heard rumors of, and about being put away. He was full of questions she didn't have answers to.

"The involuntary manslaughter is pending, and that will decide my sentence for sure." As she explained she felt two inches tall.

"What in the fuck could you have had to do with that?" he asked, angered.

"She was at my apartment. And she'd used Johnny's stash, which was in a dresser in my room. They're saying it's m-"

"That's so fucked. When dad finds out he'll get you a good lawyer. We'll get you out of this," Marshall's voice was so protective and sounded so much like their father's voice that Maya cried harder.

"They're going to hate me, Marsh," she managed to choke. He soothed her and insisted they would love her all the same. They'd get through this. Their parents were out of service at their uncle's house upstate but Marshall assured Maya they'd come to visit as soon as possible. He also got Maya's mailing address.

"I'm just glad you're okay. You're okay in there, right?"

"I'm fine, little brother," she said with a smile. "I love you."

"Love you, too," he replied. They said their goodbyes and upon hanging up, she lifted her shirt to dry her eyes. Not watching her surroundings she almost tripped over the person on the phone beside her. Without looking up she breathed an apology.

...

The day had renewed Maya Luna. She was delighted at lunch to overhear that there was a group meeting for yoga in the late afternoon, and made note of the location.

Taystee was thrilled to hear of her conversation with her brother. The two sat at a table separate from Taystee's friends so they could speak in confidence. Maya didn't want to let the hateful women ruin her high spirits. Towards the end of the meal period the two returned to the table and Taystee was pulled into a conversation excluding Maya. The girl didn't mind one bit as she finished her banana.

She decided to spend the remaining time between lunch and yoga outside. She couldn't get enough. She found a patch of wildflowers that would have called Bea's name, and for the first time she allowed herself to smile at the memory of her friend. The two made countless flower bracelets, necklaces, and crowns in their schoolgirl days and Maya now sat to do the same. She carefully knotted one flower with another, and then another. When she was joined by another woman, she was shocked to see who.

"I used to make those with my sister. When we were kids." A real name escaped her for she only really knew the lady as Crazy Eyes. She forced a smile at the recollection.

"I made them with my best friend," she offered. Crazy Eyes nodded slowly.

"The one who died. How did you do it?" Maya looked down at her flowers in confusion, her work pretty obvious. "No, no, no. Your best friend, how did you... how did she die?" Maya's own eyes widened.

"I didn't kill her, if that's what you're asking." She was growing breathless.

"You said it was your fault. Or that that's why you're here." The matter-of-fact gaze staring back at her made her queasy.

"The, um, drugs that killed her. They think they were mine." Lips formed into an _oh_. "They weren't," Maya added for good measure.

"You don't seem like a killer," a dark hand touched Maya's. "I'm sorry that happened to you."

"Thank you," Maya said with another forced smile.

"I'm Suzanne." The hand squeezed hers before it was drawn back. Maya was touched by the effort the girl was making.

"I'm Maya," she offered, and received a knowing nod. Suzanne had begun a floral creation of her own as she nodded.

"Sorry for freezing you out, we just can't trust anyone new. Vee fucked us real bad. We won't let anyone else fuck us like that."

"I understand," Maya murmured, going back to work. Suzanne just nodded. After a long silence, she spoke again.

"You don't seem like you'll fuck us like that. I like you. You're a gentle soul, I can tell." The girl took on a profound tone which struck Maya. She gave her first real smile of the encounter.

...

Going into downward dog, Maya was surprised as the flower crown she forgot she wore fell from her head to the ground. It was Suzanne's handiwork, and was crafted much better than the bracelet she had tied around the other girl's wrist. They were exchanged as peace offerings on Suzanne's insistence, and the girl with knots of hair promised she'd try to convince the other girls Maya was cool.

Deep breathing was a skill Maya had long forgotten. She was remembering now how beneficial it was to her for so long. She moved from pose to pose with ease and joyful familiarity filled her lungs. Yoga Jones called poses gently from the front of the room and the surprisingly crowded class did as instructed. The experience was surprisingly and truthfully enjoyable. Maya chose to accept the invitation to sit with Yoga Jones and her friends for dinner. She was learning to love meeting new people, and was surprised at how many ladies she was coming to truly like.

"Are you going to the movie viewing tonight?" Sister Ingalls asked. "They're showing 'Breakfast at Tiffany's', a pleasantly surprising choice."

"I've had a big day, I really think I'd like to lie down." As if on cue, Maya failed to stifle a yawn. She interjected her share into the conversation, but by the end found herself struggling to keep her eyes open. She gave a heartfelt goodbye before making her way back to cell block B.

Though her eyes drooped through the duration of her walk back, the minute Maya's head hit the pillow she was wide awake. She fought herself, willing sleep to come and to give her mind a rest. After failing miserably she retreated to the bathroom, toothbrush and towel in tow. The dingy bathroom was deserted, and Maya wasn't quite sure she was allowed to be there, but what could happen? She was in fucking prison. The water sprayed steaming hot and reddened her tan skin. It was the best shower she'd had in quite a while. She soaked it in until it ran lukewarm before toweling dry; out of habit she remained in the shower while drying and re-dressing. She brushed her teeth then retreated back to her room.

From her dresser she plucked the book she had checked out the evening before, after her shift at the library. She hugged her legs to her chest and rested the book at her feet, resting her chin on her knees as she read. Minutes passed and pages turned. She didn't have the slightest inclination how much time had passed when she heard a giggling girl fast approaching. Poussey was all smiles as she entered the room and immediately started rummaging through her things. She didn't notice Maya until the seated girl sneezed. Maya sneezed like a whisper, but her presence had gone unnoticed and Poussey jumped in surprise.

"Yo, I, uh, didn't see you there." Poussey was stuttering with what seemed to be nerves, and Maya detected a distinct slur to her voice.

"I'm sorry," Maya murmured. She braved eye contact and brown eyes met brown eyes. Her heart slammed in her chest when Poussey gave her a small, unreadable smile. She walked over to Maya's bed, Maya frozen where she sat. Poussey was full of surprises as she sank down onto Maya's bed beside her. Seated side by side the girls silently stared at each other. Maya grew dizzy when she felt Poussey's breath and fully realized their close proximity.

"I heard you earlier," Poussey murmured quickly. "Talkin' to your little bro." Maya's breath caught in her lungs. She looked back with wide doe-eyes.

"You did?"

"Man, that's mad fucked about your friend. I couldn't even imagine if T- I can't imagine." She shook her head and dropped her gaze. She shocked Maya further by reaching out and gently taking her hand. Maya's fingers were stiff even after Poussey's small, thin digits laced through; her gaze dropped to study the contact. "I'm sorry."

Maya remained silent and instead let her mind take over. Was Poussey sorry simply for her bad fortune? Or was there possibly more hiding behind the apology? Maya disregarded the thought almost as quickly as it had come. It's not like there was just a switch that could be flipped to make this girl beside her like her. The harsh, deathly looks she so often gave and the stinging comments she made were not accidental.

"I didn't tell my family I was arrested until my court date. Thought I could find a way to get myself out of it or some shit. That's one of the hardest things, man. How much this fucks with the people you don't want to fuck with." When Poussey squeezed Maya's hand, the silent girl instinctively let her hand relax, even faintly squeezing back.

"Yeah," Maya managed to murmur in agreement. She raised her eyes back to the girl beside her and gasped at the intense gaze staring back at her. The dark brown eyes that bore into her were cloudy with intoxication, and Maya wondered what she could possibly have taken. Maya was a slight girl, barely reaching 5'2, so it was strange being in such proximity to someone so close to her own size. She couldn't help but notice their hands fit each other perfectly; their arms rested against each other and Maya's skin was ablaze. She could have sworn she saw Poussey lean in even closer, but just as quickly the other girl let out a deep breath and simultaneously released Maya's hand and jumped to her feet.

"I forgot... I uh, gotta get back." She looked pained as she turned to go, pausing at the entrance to their bunk to once more gaze at Maya sadly.

...

When Maya woke, Poussey remained asleep in the bed several feet away. She watched her for a few seconds and briefly debated if she had dreamed their encounter from the night before. She shook the thoughts away and went about gathering her things for a shower.

When she returned to the cell, Poussey had just opened her eyes. Their vision locked for a moment that felt like forever. Neither said a word, neither broke their flat expressions. Maya neatly put her things away as Poussey pulled a grey sweatshirt on over her white t-shirt. She remained seated on her bed and Maya felt her eyes on her.

"Hey, Maya, help your girl out!" came from a few cells down, the booming voice drawing nearer. Taystee appeared with a grin on her face and two magazines in hand. "I'm thinking of making a change. These bitches be on point with their hair and I was thinking of hitting up Sophia later. What do you think?" The two sat on Maya's bed and excitedly poured over the options, losing themselves in the possibilities.

"Yo, your majesties, hate to break up your little beauty committee, but we're cutting it close with breakfast time." When Maya looked back up to Poussey, her heart sank to find the resentful, stone-hard glare back in place.


End file.
